


Cats and Tuna Heaven

by cat_salad



Category: Sterek (Fandom), Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Cat!Lydia, Cat!Stiles, Derek is a cat, Derek is a grumpy cat, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Pets, Stiles wants to make friends, cat!derek, originally on Tumblr, pre-Sterek - Freeform, stiles is a cat
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-12-28
Updated: 2012-12-30
Packaged: 2017-11-22 18:38:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/612962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cat_salad/pseuds/cat_salad
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles is nervous, because he's fresh out of the Pet Shop and he's completely new to the Hale House, with new scents and huge people with big hands and enormous feet, and Derek, their grumpy dark-coated cat, has already been there for five years, and Stiles wants to make a good impression, okay?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cats that wait too long

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Saucery](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saucery/gifts).



> This is for Sauce, you arousing, heart-melting, Stiles-arousing —yes, twice arousing— shipper of all things feels and rainbows and glitter, with perversion and yummy boy lips and wayward men—  
> GOD I LOVE YOU, OKAY?! 
> 
> This crack is inspired by a cat gif where a yellow-y cat slowly walks up to another dark cat, who is sitting down. The yellow cat taps it’s head and then runs off. It’s on a loop.
> 
> Thank you for understanding.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stiles is nervous, because he's fresh out of the Pet Shop and he's completely new to the Hale House, with new scents and huge people with big hands and enormous feet, and Derek, their grumpy dark-coated cat, has already been there for five years, and Stiles wants to make a good impression, okay?

Stiles is nervous, because he's fresh out of the Pet Shop and he's completely new to the Hale House, with new scents and huge people with big hands and enormous feet, and Derek, their grumpy dark-coated cat, has already been there for five years, --  
  
and Stiles wants to make a good impression, okay?  
  
Because, for some reason,  
  
Derek's grumpy and old and rather prickly, but he's also sleek and deadly (Stiles will never forget that one time he had a fight with the Argent's feline Allison from across the street) and his coat is so shiny and, and.  
  
He's the only other one he can talk to,  
  
Because, uh, well, humans are their _slaves_ , well, --  
  
Stiles _tries_ to be kind to Laura and Peter and the rest, and he doesn't mind what cat food they give him (I mean, Frieskies and GoCat and freaking I-am-an-IAMS-Cat, who says no to that?) he's not fussy at all and _loves_ petting time,  
  
unlike Derek, who just broods and naps and hisses and scratches anyone that comes near to him,  
  
which annoys Stiles, because it's morally wrong to make Peter's kids or anyone's kids cry, so he takes it upon himself to make their loud wails of pain and rejected feelings disappear by being all cute and tilting his head and _"meow"s_ right in their little plump faces, and -- _whoa_.  
  
God, he's suddenly the favourite cat in the house. (and he still hasn't really properly introduced himself to Derek yet)  
  
With children running after him with happy peals of laughter, and the occasional teenager grabbing him and petting him for their own comfort, and whenever Laura's hands work their way into his fur, carded fingers and smooth palms and all, it feels like Tuna Heaven.  
  
But Derek is still Laura's favourite, and he's been that way since she turned twenty and opened a birthday present, where out popped a tiny kitten.  
  
But hey, Stiles still likes his cuddling sessions on the sofa.  
  
But today, he'd sworn an oath to his cat-hood that he'd make friends with Derek Hale. And that maybe they could use each other's cat-flaps and go hunting together and that they could lick each other's fur clean, because Stiles has _seen_ how carefully and thoroughly Derek cleans his fur, making his dark pelt shine with measuring licks from his rough tongue, from his padded paws to his sleek tail.  
  
So Stiles hestitantly, dutifully, makes his way across the carpeted floor towards Derek. And Derek doesn't look that impressed with him, but he isn't hissing or glaring at him or anything, so it's as ghood as it gets at the moment. Okay, so Stiles is scared that with one pounce he'll get clawed by Derek and end up sprawled on the floor under him, --not that he'd really mind it _that_ much--, but he's sworn an oath to his cat-hood and the Tuna Heaven, so he's not going to fuck it up, and so, slowly, slowly, step by step, hestitating, staring at Derek the whole time, he gets closer and closer,  
  
until,  
  
 _Okay_ , he tells himself, and then _very quickly_ , while Derek's green eyes drill a hole into his skull, very quickly pats his head with a cushioned paw, and runs the hell out of the kitchen before Derek sinks his claws into his leg.  
  
Except that Derek hadn't hissed or wanted to scratch him; he'd just huffed as if to say,  
  
 _What took you so long?_  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was really tempted to make grumpy Derek!Cat into this: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mbuypt8R0M1ri87b4o1_1280.jpg  
> but in the end I decided for this one: http://0.tqn.com/d/create/1/0/N/X/1/-/Ninja-reminisce.JPG  
> Stiles!Cat: http://deathvalleycats.webs.com/Fawnstep.jpg  
> http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/14700000/Beautifull-cat-cats-14749898-1600-1200.jpg  
> Allison!Cat: http://www.freewebs.com/starclanscat/guard-cat.jpg


	2. Push-ups and Meows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s been a week since Laura showed up at his door, jostling a cardboard box in her arms. He's starting to think that he should have shut the door on her when the box let out a meow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All I see is Derek. Seriously. With Stiles-kitten.  
> This is seperate from my original animal-verse with Stiles and Derek as cats.

   
  


It’s been a week since Laura showed up at his door, jostling a cardboard box in her arms. He should have been suspicious when he spotted the pencil-stabbed air holes. Should have frowned when he heard a tiny thumping heartbeat other than their own, the smell of _animal_ emanating from the box. Should have shut the door on her when the box let out a meow.

But maybe, he supposed, he should just take the thing from her, just to make her happy that he won’t be alone in the apartment all the time.

So he’d taken the box from her, albeit reluctantly, and frowned when her face burst out in a beautiful, _happy_ smile, feeling slightly cheated.

That’d been a week ago, and he’d kind of grown used to the tiny, squirming ball of downy fur, emitting tiny mewls and begging for food, stumbling around his flat, filling his home with the sound of his soft paws and tiny heartbeat.

Laura had named it Stiles, and the pet had come with a collar and a month’s worth of food for free. Apparently it was an abandoned cast-off of a litter at the Animal Shelter. So of course Laura had to adopt it. Couldn’t bear the thought of strays since she and Derek and Peter were the only survivors.

Derek’s petted the furry ball occasionally. Stiles, the kitten, seemed to think it was the best thing on earth, as his tiny little skull was scratched and rubbed and his ears and neck were stroked with acute precision.

One morning he goes through his usual training,— thirty sit-ups, twenty jumping jacks, six minutes with a skipping rope, twelve burpies, and forty push ups, using both hands and then with one, all done in no particular order — and is surprised to find Stiles’ little heartbeat, like a soft bell, come closer. He’s busy blasting through his push ups when he sees Stiles’ small shadow splayed across the wooden floor in front of him. A small black tail, bushy and baby soft, flicks back and forth between his vision.

Then, tiny paws land on his shoulder, and bob up and down with his movement. Stiles’ heart rate increases, and he lets out a loud meow, high pitched. His tiny claws dig into the fabric of Derek’s shirt, but he pays it no heed.

He snorts, and shakes his head. Stiles is enjoying his training and seems to want to be his coach during it all.

He continues, his flat filled with little mewls and happy meows.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The X-Rated version of this story includes Derek’s tiny kitten transforming into a young, lithe and flexible adult. And totally naked. And he still wants to play coach. 
> 
> Hmm, ... maybe I will continue that story.


End file.
